Tips for Safer Online Dating

Are you finding a compatible partner on internet? Or only having fun while dating online? Then you have found the best place – Internet. You are aware of the fact that Internet is a very savvy place to surf and socialize. But sometimes a little mistake from your side can be disastrous, especially when you are finding a date or having a casual flirt. So go through the safety tips to be followed while you dating online.

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1. Keep your personal information private- Does a website pops up to fill a free email account to let you chat or send instant messages. Then you must know that a single bit of your personal information could let anybody to intervene in your personal life.

2. Keep your Facebook and Twitter info safe- While posting any personal information or any additional information on Facebook or Twitter keep a record of it. In case you forget anything, then your personal data could be handy.

3. Do not use familiar screen names- Never ever use such screen names that can help in guessing your personal identity or local address. You have the choice of keeping your identity anonymous and tell only those whom you trust.

4. Install Anti-Security check- It is beneficial to install anti-security check so as to protect your personal information. This will also help in keeping your personal information safe as well nobody will be able to access your private data.

5. Do not pay heed to threatening e-mails- All online dating users should not respond or react to any threatening, annoying or harassing emails.

6. Do not make calls from your personal number- You have to call somebody? As a protective measure, use your office number or Local phone booth. It is your responsibility to protect your identity while finding love through a dating website.

7. Have consistent check- It is very important to double check the information provided by anonymous online dating users. Do not have a blind faith just because you are in search of true love.

8. Is it really them in the photograph? – Beware of any photograph sent by any online dating user as it may not them in the photograph. It must be any random image picked up from the internet.

9. Are you be harassed by online dating users? – Online dating might be fun but at some note you can land in trouble. So if you find yourself in this situation then immediately call the police.

These are some simple tips to be used when dating online. Though dating online is fun and easy too but you need not reveal yourself truly unless you want to. Many hawkers are out there in the internet savvy world who can pose threat to you. So be aware about online dating and also about precautionary steps to be taken when you are in search of love on internet

How to Find the Right Person in 90 Days

Disclaimer: All of the online dating tales here are true and took place over a 90 day period through online dating services. Names have been changed to protect the guilty and the innocent.
Promptly on the eve of new beginnings in 2005, I found myself 30 something and single after nearly 10 years of committed relationships. My feelings about this? I was ecstatic! I couldn’t wait to get started dating again and I embarked upon my journey with what I now define as naive enthusiasm.

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Not interested in the 20-something chore of being “in the scene” to increase my visibility, I enrolled with two popular online dating services, posted my best marketing pitch to attract the man of my dreams and embraced this new and modern means of achieving the traditional “hook up”.

Tale of the $1.50 Wonder

After a brief online introduction and a phone call that consisted of “you sound neat, when can we meet,” my online prospect and I made a date for drinks. Mr. Wonder had no ideas on where we should meet so I suggested a sexy, but comfortable location on the ocean near his job. Warning! A man with no ideas, is a man with no ideas.

First impressions? The online photos I’d grown fond of were nostalgia of a time that had long passed. He was clearly 10 years older than he’d represented. After getting comfy on a couch in the bar, my date proceeded to slouch into the couch seat and tell me non-verbally that he didn’t feel very good about himself, and verbally, more than I needed to hear on a first, second or third date. Like how he stood up other online dates before me because he didn’t like the way they looked. Oooh I’m flattered, tell me more. Like his compliments about other women in the middle of our conversation. “I usually don’t date people from work, but this woman is fine.” Fee fi fo fum, my date is really dumb!

To top off this puzzle of an experience, after securing my agreement for a second date, he promptly calls for the check, reviews the bill and asks me for $1.50, because he only has a $20? To cover up his faux pas, he immediately rattles on about “another date he had who ordered a $30 drink and how he’s not a cheap man, but, wah, wah, wah, wah.”

As he continued to sink his battleship, I calculated the following in my head…

1 drink for Mr. Wonder $10

1 drink for Me $10

Grand Total $21.50 w/ tax.

Grand Conclusion: He’s not even going to leave a tip!?

Mouth hanging open on the inside, on the outside, I reached into my purse for a $5 bill and told him to tell the waitress to keep the change. He was still babbling about information I had no interest in hearing at this point and as we got off the couch to leave, the waitress yells after my date. “Sir – you dropped your $1.”

Instant Karma – Priceless. Next!

Tale of the Perfect Path to No Where

His style — persistent. Very attractive! A man who goes after what he wants, usually gets what he wants. After being stood up (non-intentionally) by me once, Mr. Perfect called me again for a rain check and insisted on fitting into my schedule wherever he could get in rather than wait another week. Even if that meant Father’s Day, we were getting off to a great start! Traditional to the core, he picked me up looking so good that I gave my girlfriend (there to take down his license plate number in case I disappeared) a Chuck E. Cheese grin over his shoulder when I gave him a hug hello. The date consisted of an early dinner over an NBA Finals court war; getting to know you talk; lots of complements, a fantastic meal; and a musical dedication on the car ride home. The entire evening was flawless, easy conversation, similar family backgrounds, educationally compatible, professional goals in sync and to top it off a special shared moment on relationship values and ideals. He was what most would call a perfect gentleman.

Reality? He was a dating enigma. That mirage of a perfect looking, sounding and acting man that pops up periodically along your dating quest to give you hope in a sea of doubt. He wines you, dines you, asks when he can see you again and then…disappears. Poof!

I’m up on the latest in male-female dynamics so — I guess he just wasn’t that into me. Next please!

The Musician

This guy was my “duty date”. The one you go out with because he’s fine and fulfills a fantasy of some sort. In this case he was a guitar player and I like nice hands. What he did right. Call on time, set the date, suggest a location and kiss really well. What he should have thought about for two more seconds, meeting new people in the middle of trying to kick a 20 year smoking habit. Come on man! Give yourself and me — a break! I never really got to see the real person I was on a date with and though I considered the opportunity for a roll in the hay (because he had all the right equipment), I just couldn’t stick around to see it evolve.

Instead I honored the commitment I made to myself — No More Projects! Next!

Mr. Right for Someone Else (Mr. RFSE)

By the time I’d gotten to what would be my final online date, I was over the special meeting places and going out of my way to dazzle a complete stranger. So, when Mr. RFSE asked what I’d like to do, I chose something simple. I’ll meet you at the bookstore for some coffee.

His style? Cute. Not my type. Occupation? Similar field. Conversation? Really good, we talked for nearly two hours. Overall assessment? He was great for someone else.

Even when I ran into him again at a local party, it only temporarily put me through the maybe I should reconsider this phase. I just didn’t feel any chemistry with this person and that’s something you can’t fake.

Conclusion. I just wasn’t that into him.

What I Learned

In between these experiences, there was some online flirting, around town flirting, a couple of long distance connections and a brief, bazaar courtship that included a spattering of miscellaneous text messages that he interpreted as “getting to know each other.”

I think technology is great for many things, but when it comes to finding the “right” person it’s no more simple or complex than traditional means. Both methods are dependent on the right timing and the chemistry two people share.

If you’re on the dating track and just want to get back into the ball game, online dating offers lots of variety (if you’re up to it) and many opportunities to try out a few things. However, I believe finding the right person is not something you can invoke on command or set time limits on. It’s an organic process that when ripe delivers much sweetness.

“Mixed” Dating: What it was and What it Is

When we think about mixed dating or a ‘˜mixed’ marriage, we might each be thinking about different things. The ‘˜mix’ usually is not a reference to any one set of specifics. It is, more commonly, a way of characterizing a relationship with someone who is different from yourself in some way deemed consequential by someone — or by the family, neighbors, community or larger society in general.
When I was young, if a Jewish boy dated (or, heaven forbid) married a non-Jewish girl, this was called a ‘mixed’ relationship or marriage.

interracial-couples-dating

Among the Christian neighbors I grew up with, one kind of Christian (a Catholic, for example marrying a different kind -a Protestant of some type) was regarded as being ‘mixed’ at best — disrespectful and inappropriate at worse. Everyone seemed to think that anyone engaged in a ‘mixed’ relationship of marriage was somehow either mixed up or was ‘acting out’ deliberate rebelliousness. Before I hit adulthood, while that language was still common, it was more often applied to couples of different races.

It probably always was an issue but, where and how I grew up, that was not even discussed, except for the brief flurry of talk about Sammy Davis, Jr. (who we regarded as one of our own because, though black, he had converted to Judaism) when he married a white woman, Swedish-born actress May Britt back in 1960. This made his racially mixed marriage odd but, to us, acceptable.

Today, as was the case when I was young, what defines a ‘˜mixed’ date, relationship or marriage is dependent on the context and the points of view of the people who decide that the label of ‘˜mixed’ applies. It is a purely subjective as that.

Some people regard the social or romantic interaction between certain social classes as being unacceptable mixing. This historically dominant notion, particularly in countries that include, most dramatically, Great Britain and India, has faded considerably but remains an ever present, albeit lesser thread in the weave of their fabric of social expectations and unwritten rules.

South Africa, these very United States and many other countries share histories in which there was simply little if any socially sanctioned inter-racial dating and marriage.

In academic circles and certain social sets who regarded themselves as being desirably elite, it would be an unacceptable mix for a College graduate or professional person to relate, by date or continuing relationship, to a person of lesser intellectual development or achievement. Perhaps surprisingly, the opposition to ‘˜mixing’ was not always a ‘from the top down’ phenomenon.
Some impoverished people are as biased against the well-to-do as is the converse.

There are times when mixed dating is engaged in for ulterior motives, At times, reflecting a deliberate display of a rejection of traditional values. Relationships that begin as social statements are less promising in their long-term outcome than are those begun driven by people demonstrating their attraction to each other rather than their deliberate avoidance of what they have been taught is expected.

There are social circles in which mixed dating and marriage is actually highly valued, reinforced and encouraged. We hear less about this, but that is not because the activity does not occur. It is more apt to be a reflection of what makes ‘news’ that will draw the attention of someone reading a newspaper or magazine. Television news, too, tends to focus on information describing war,
corruption, discord or tragedy.

The bottom line is that the ‘mixing’ is in the mind of the person who thinks that way and uses the term in a way that connotes some kind of breach of accepted etiquette.

Crossing an implied or explicit social boundary is not without consequences, but as Virgil was originally credited with saying in ancient Rome, “omnia vincit amor,” Love Conquers All.

Christians and Interracial Dating – The Beginning of Acceptance

There is good news in race relations on the Gallup Poll as the American minds are slowly beginning to understand things in a way. In fact, almost half of the generations over the age of 65 agree to the idea of interracial marriage. That is, most likely other people doing it which is obviously not a law to be enforced on everyone to have to do it. The youth of the modern age from 18 to 29 approve interracial dating by 95%. After all, the only people who date interracial or cross culturally does it by their own personal choice. The choice has nothing to do with shade , but it expands the option of finding that special someone. As for Christians, this lifestyle widely portrays the notion we all should have known regarding that Bible quote ” all men have sinned and have shortcomings”. Therefore, the issue of interracial or cross cultural relationships should not have blown into such an issue to debate.

Inter-racial-marriage

Meaning, we are all equal and no one is above anyone else in God’s eyes. Unfortunately, people who chose to represent God’s love through Christianity fail continuously to integrate their church family into more than just one color. However, there has been a growth in churches who use the word “United” in their title as an open invitation for all cultures to enter their church family. There are many multicultural mega churches who accept with a whole hearted welcome people from all backgrounds and cultures to worship God. Accepting diversity is accepting God’s masterpieces he created when he made man in all shades with all different features. He didn’t stop there but to make different species of one animals, flowers, plants, trees, rocks and much more.There is a book by authors George Yancey and Sherelyn Whittum Yancey about racially diverse Christian leaders. Interracial and cross cultural families should expect to deal with opposition from bossy individuals. Remember that you are not wrong for your decision, no one has a right to dictate what you should do if you cannot return the favor, and God isn’t against it. We are supposed to remember that God will help us find a way to live with the opposition we already experience as Christians.

Some no Christian interracial couples experience discrimination by peoples negative reactions, but Christians must think about these issues also. Moreover, Christians need to think about what God says in the Bible over what the world thinks. As a Christian, we all have a responsibility to God. Not to leave others out, but to represent God in everything we do. The world wants for themselves, but we seek to abandon worldly thought and strive toward heaven. Family, friends and society will have their views on what people should do in their own personal life…get it? The Bible says “therefore a man to leave his family and cleave unto his wife”. As for friends, it should never be a one sided relationship where your opinions mean nothing. Another Bible quote is “If they speak not according to this word, there is no light in them”.

Society is a part of the world that Christians are told to live as examples to and to tell others. However, if they do not want to learn of God’s love you must not force it. Neither should you in return listen to what they have to say. I believe that in the past before civil rights and human rights there were a lot of underhanded things that were done to people of color. For example, giving low marks to those minorities who actually strive to do better, lying to people about apartment rentals being taken, denying people a job, in restaurants burning up the food for certain people, and the list goes on. Couples today can file a complaint and sue those who overstep their bounds. Lawyers are here for a reason, and family and friends should support you over a bunch of strangers. After all, friend and family are supposed to be your strongest supporters. Those who decide to marry in their own race should not feel intimidated by those who cross over.

You can accept people in many other ways by letting them feel equal to you, and not less important than you. People sometimes feel as if they are being judged by not doing what a particular person does. Perhaps, those words can also help people accept the unions without feeling pressure to do the same. Therefore, no one will be affected when others cross over to other races. These couples will then be treated with the utmost respect once people realize that no one is telling everyone to do it in order to escape the label of prejudice. Trying to appear non prejudice may give the total opposite effect of being prejudice. We should marvel and smile at these families for making a beautiful step forward. These Christian couples should not faint from showing the world that it is possible to love another human being regardless of color or cultural differences.

However, If one door closes, there are probably other interracial couples who know of down to earth areas who would not react irrationally. I suggest looking on line for advice and help. As for the children of these unions, look for good multicultural neighborhoods . Here are some sites that can help those who decide to date openly or marry openly: http://www.uberdate.com , http://www.chritech.com , http://www.alternative-dating-sites.com, http://www.neighborhoodscout.com , http://www.city-data.com, http://www.prleap.com, http://www.interracialvillage.com and http://www.socialgrid.com.

10 Step to Tell the Difference Between Marriage Material and Dating Material

In this day and age there is a lot of dating going around. People believe that someone is for them when they get instantly crush because the other person true nature was to just date while the other person sees a future. How can you tell if your partner wants a long term life together or just a few times around “the park”.

Online dating

1. If your partner brings it up first
2. if your partner introduces you to their family members.(cousins not included)
3. If your partner looks at rings every time you pass a jewelry store.
4. If your partner wants to meet your family.
5. If your partner cuddle after sexual intercourse.
6. If your partner shows you apartment ads in the newspaper
7. If your partner denies sex to cater to you.(give you a rub down)
8. If you partner gives up a top paying job just to spend more time with you.
9. If your partner cuts off all their opposite sex friend.
10. If your partner talks about kids to you.

These are just a few steps you might be able to tell whether of not your partner is serious or not to take your relationship to the next level

Keeping Safe with Online Dating

These days people are meeting in various different ways. One of the most popular ways is through Online Dating Sites like e-Harmony and match.com. When we meet someone online, sometimes they are not who they say they are. There are somethings we all can do to keep ourselves safe.

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Never give Personal Information: no one should ask you for your personal information. When you first meet someone do not give out your personal information like phone numbers, address, or any other personal information that someone could use to harm you in some way. You should get to know a person for a couple months before even giving out your name. If he or she is not willing to wait to get acquainted, it’s not worth it.

Wait before Meeting: You should meet a person unless you really know them. You may trust most people you meet, but not everyone on the internet can be trusted. Talk online for a couple months via instant messenger, email or whatever. If the person is truly interested in getting to know you, they’d wait. If the one you are talking to is persistent in meeting, don’t be quick to trust them.

Ask a lot of Questions: Ask a whole lot of different questions to gain more knowledge of a person. nothing real personal, but stuff about hobbies, family, interests, even religious thoughts. You can tell a lot about a person based on their interests. I don’t respond to certain profiles because of things listed in their interests.

Be Picky: It’s Okay to be picky when it comes to online dating. Know exactly what you want out of the people you would like to get to know. View all of the person’s profile, not just certain parts, if you are unsure of the profile, don’t agree to chatting. First instincts on the profile is normally how you’d feel about the actual person. Don’t agree to just anyone; set your standards to a higher level then you would if you met someone at a club or something. Online dating is different then meeting in person.

Meet in Public: When and if you decide to meet up with someone you met online, make the meeting place somewhere public and with a number of people. Don’t go to their place, yours or even a semi-private place like a movie theater. Just as you took time to talk online, take time before you go somewhere private.

Online dating is becoming more and more popular, but we never really know who we’re meeting with. Sometimes we need to take various precautions to ensure our safety. If you follow these guidelines and the other person is willing to work with you and take things slow, you’ve got a trustworthy person. Happy dating!

Relationship Tips: Three Reasons Why He Takes You for Granted

Women of all ages voice the complaint that their special guys sometimes (or frequently) take them for granted. If you have found yourself in this situation, then you realize that depending upon the nature of the relationship, this can mean any number of things. Perhaps your beau used to shower you with flowers and candy, or multiple phone calls/emails a day. Maybe it seems as if he’s not as into you as he once was. There are a lot of reasons why the man in your life appears to be losing interest in the romance. Some of those reasons you’re aware of already.

inter-racial-relationship

“Taken for granted? What does that mean?”

One thing that people must realize is that men and women have different thought processes. Women are natural “nurturers.” Thus, it is common for them to expect the niceties that come along with being in a committed relationship. But simply telling your partner that you think he’s taking you for granted may not be enough of an explanation to evoke the response that you’re looking for.

Put plainly, you must first think about the behavior that you’d like him to display. Are the things you want him to do, things he was doing in the beginning of the relationship? If not, then he will have no idea what it is you expect of him. For instance, if he’s never bought you roses on Valentine’s Day, then it would be fairly unrealistic to be hopeful of receiving them out of the blue. In other words, make sure that the kind of behavior you expect is in accordance with the way he treated you at the start of the romance. Otherwise, the best thing to do is to gently broach the topic of what it is you want. Tell him that you really enjoy hearing from him during the day, instead of asking him why he does not call (which might put him on the defensive.) The point is that you might need to be fairly specific with him so that he understands your needs.

You take him for granted too…

The overly-quoted cliché, “two wrongs certainly do not make a right” is applicable when you think about how it concerns people in romantic relationships. Unfortunately, people who get their feelings hurt sometimes echo the behavior of the people who hurt them. That being said, it is very possible that your mate thinks you take him for granted too.

You must remember that men are human beings with feelings too. They want to feel desired, loved, and appreciated too. If your husband finally remembers to take out the trash regularly, after your having harassed him for weeks, there is nothing wrong with telling him how much his help and cooperation means to you. No reward is necessary for such a simple task. But the acknowledgement will make him feel appreciated for his efforts. If you overlook the little things that he does for you, he may subconsciously become resentful because he feels nothing he does will please you.

Additionally, there is nothing wrong with women initiating romance. Imagine how surprised your husband would be if you planned a two-person “surprise” party in the middle of the week for no specific reason whatsoever. Men definitely appreciate ladies who indulge them every once in a while. The occasional effort on your part may prompt him to reciprocate more often.

You smother him…

This is perhaps the most common reason why men at times treat their sweethearts “indifferently.” When women devote all of their energy to their romantic relationships, it can sometimes cause friction in many areas of the romance. It’s important that you allow him the freedom to do the things he enjoys doing on his own. Attempting to account for his every move might cause him to act indignant. He may feel that you’re trying to check up on him. Thus, all those sweet nothings will soon be out the window.

While there should definitely be some sense of cohesion in the relationship, it’s imperative that you do not take yourself for granted. Make sure that you’re spending time doing [some] things that you enjoyed before becoming part of a couple. Everyone needs a little breathing room, especially couples who live together. If you never have the opportunity to experience new things, and miss each other, then your relationship may become stale very quickly.